Excuse me...Yes, I am!

My kids and I took a little trip out and about for a few groceries this morning and as I was driving down the expressway, I saw a sign that pierced right through this mother's heart. Plastered on a billboard was the phrase "Supermoms breastfeed: Other moms do it, so can you."

Don't get me wrong, I'm ALL about breastfeeding. I know all the benefits breastfeeding can have on both mother and child, and I encourage moms I come in contact with to nurse their baby. My issue with this statement is that it fails to recognize one very special group of moms...those who CAN'T breastfeed. Not those who won't (I personally feel that if you are able to breastfeed, then you should, but I still stand by the opinion that it is every mom's personal choice.), but those who can't. I am part of this special group of moms and I understand deeply the hurt and disappointment a mom feels when she wants to give her child the absolute best, and can't.
I have four beautiful children that I have been entrusted with and have the privilege to raise. I have attempted to nurse all four. When I got pregnant with our third child, I was very well self-informed on the subject of breastfeeding and had learned from my past mistakes. I was POSITIVE breastfeeding would be successful...third time's a charm, right? For four months, I pushed and pushed myself to be successful in breastfeeding. For the first week of my child's life I slept on the couch, setting my timer and trying to get in a few minutes of sleep before waking up to nurse/use the SNS tube, feed the rest of the formula through a bottle, pump and then, finally, sleep for 45 minutes before starting the process all over again. I drank tons of water and ate oatmeal, I took liquid Mother's Milk and Goat's Rue (I am not always able to swallow pills, so I had to take the liquid form or opt out), I stayed away from asparagus (maybe not a big deal for you, but it's my favorite, so THAT was a sacrifice!), etc. I did receive help from a lactation consultant, as well. I tried everything there is to try and do...but the most I could ever pump or hand express maybe came to 0.25 oz. And that's a big maybe.

it.was.devastating.

The serious lack of sleep, the exhaustion of caring for two other children, my husband and my home and the heart-wrenching realization that I will never be capable of exclusively breastfeeding my babies spiraled me down into a dark year of depression. I bought into the lie that I wasn't as good of a mom to my kids because I couldn't provide the absolute best. There were a few other reasons why I struggled with this issue and with the resulting depression, but I will save that for another time. I am not ready to share that part yet. (And just to clarify, I no longer struggle with depression, thanks to my gracious Lord and my wonderful husband, who both lovingly yanked me out of it! I have also placed some safeguards in my life so that when I feel it trying to creep in, I have a plan of attack. I will talk about that another time, too.)

Now, I understand that the heart behind that billboard ad was most likely well-meaning, and again, I am a strong advocate for breastfeeding. But I would hate to think that any fellow mom out there who can not breastfeed their child would think that they are less of a mom because they do not nurse. DO NOT BELIEVE IT! It is a LIE. You are a good mom - a supermom! - because you are giving your child your best. Notice I didn't say the best...I said, your best...because your best is the best.
When I became pregnant with our fourth child, I decided that I would give it a shot, but would not allow myself to find my identity as a good mom in breastfeeding. I nursed my child for a week (I used the SNS tube with formula, as well) and after seeing his one week old weight, decided to stop. He was not gaining weight because he was burning so many calories trying to breastfeed! And he had even caught on to the mechanics of nursing faster than our other children. We have been solely formula feeding him ever since. Our son is four months old now, gaining weight a lot faster than his siblings did, and is a happy, thriving baby.

So, yes. I am indeed a supermom.



By the way, I don't cloth diaper, either. *gasp!*

Let loose and get messy!

Have you had fun with your kids lately? I'm talking about messy fun. (Yes, I know it means you will have ONE more thing to clean up later, but just hear me out :) )

Our children cherish the time we spend with them, and even more so when we make an extra effort to do something silly or messy. Here are a few ideas:

-Break out the bubbles...inside!

-Give each child a shallow cookie sheet, then dump some flour inside. Give them different toys to play with (boys LOVE using their trucks and dump truck to scoop up the "dirt"). Use this also has an educational activity...write out the alphabet with your finger in the flour. (For an even more fun and messier option, use shaving cream to write out the alphabet!)

-Put swimsuits on the kids and let them play in your indoor pool. Everyone has one...yes, you do! Who says an indoor pool has to be bigger than the size of a bathtub in order to have fun? :)